Michael Phelps Is Hittin’ That

Michael Phelps is like me. He enjoys pretty women. If there is anything else that he might like more than that, that would be a little bit of controversy to keep him in the headlines. That is probably why he is dating Miss California. I can’t really blame him, even though she is a homophobe, she is totally hot and I would hit that shit 6 ways a Sunday. Both Michael and Carrie aren’t really “celebrities.” Probably because they have no Hollywood talent. But we did get to hear about the relationship from Carrie’s grandmother. Grandmother?

Jeanette Coppolla, Carrie Prejean’s grandmother tells Radar, ” Carrie and Michael have been out to baseball games and lunch. He always calls her when he is in town and they go out.” So he isn’t really “banging” Carrie Prejean. Which leaves the door wide open to me. Someone who doesn’t shave his chest. A real man that can chop down trees with his bare hands and can eat 15 pancakes in one sitting. A man like me. A man who can, damn it! I broke a nail! Now I have to go downtown and see the manicurist again.

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