Fatback Media

When you are a celebrity, the world is your oyster. You can go anywhere you want and do just about anything you want. Except for Hayden Panettiere. Just recently she went to a 21+ club called NV Lounge in N.Y. and when the bar keep asked for her ID she gave it to him. But he didn’t give it back. This is not legal. It is however legal for him to kick her out of the bar. I am pretty sure he just wanted the ID so he could jack off to it later. That is what I would do.

Afterwards Hayden called the cops and they came and got the ID back. Hayden needs to take a tip from the book of under age teenage self destruction authored by Lindsay Lohan. When Lindsay was 19 she was in bars until 3 in the morning and the paparazzi would snap pics of her passed out in cars the following morning. Tip #1: when asked for ID just say” I am Hayden Panettiere bitch!” Tip #2: NEVER hang out in the commons area. Go to the V.I.P. section and stay there like it is your personal condo. Tip #3: Always insist that someone else pay for your drinks. You are rich, you don’t need to waste money on booze when there are fans everywhere you look. Tip#4: Always make sure your friends don’t have a hidden camera on their person when you go to the bathroom to do blow. Follow these tips, and you will be become the train wreck of the year. Your picture will be on the cover of every tabloid magazine, and people will love you.

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