Fatback Media

Singer, crackhead, hottie dead-man-walkin’ Amy Winehouse has smoked so much crack that she has emphysema – a disease usually relegated to lifelong chain-smoking coal miners.

Amy Winehouse, who has been hospitalized and undergoing tests after collapsing, is suffering the early stages of emphysema, her father says.

“With smoking the crack cocaine and the cigarettes her lungs are all gunked up,” Mitch Winehouse tells the Sunday Mirror in the U.K. “There are nodules around the chest and dark marks. She’s got 70 percent lung capacity.” (PEOPLE)

I’m no psychologist but I think it’s safe to say that Amy Winehouse loves drugs. She loves drugs like Christians love Jesus and little kids love puppies. I think if you asked Amy Winehouse to chew off her own leg or stop smoking crack for a half day she would say, “Can I get some Lowry’s? Because nothing brings out the flavor of leg like some Lowry’s seasoning salt.” It’s true.