Beyoncé is Pregnant. Maybe.

The smokin’ hot chicks from Hollyscoop just gave me an exclusive!!! Well, I’m on their mass email list, but I’m pretty sure I’m thiiiiis close to asking one of them out. I have a good feeling. Anyway, turns out newly married Beyoncé is pregnant.

Hollyscoop has learned exclusively through multiple sources that Beyonce is expecting. A source close to the couple revealed, “Beyonce is 100% pregnant, which is why the couple rushed their wedding.” (HollyScoop)

How can you tell when a girl from the south is pregnant? She gets married 2 months later. It’s a long standing tradition that country whores have been doing for generations. My mom was pregnant with me in her junior yearbook photo. Hawt.