True story: I once woke up to an ex-boyfriend who snuck into my house using a copy he made of the key he gave back to me. He kissed me on the cheek to wake me up and I thought it was my current boyfriend. Imagine my surprise. Well, multiply that creep factor tenfold and I think you may be getting at how stalkerish the dude serenading Paula Abdul was on American Idol this last night. This guy makes my ex look like a pussycat. I mean had he broken into my house he would have cut me into pieces . . . then “caulked” me. . . .